"i bet this is hard for you..."

I am so exhausted with my life right now.

Like, mentally exhausted and physically exhausted.

When you give someone the power to break your heart, they probably will.

Sometimes I'm just a girl with a broken heart.
I'm not strong. I'm not awesome. I'm not amazing.
I don't have hope, I don't have anything -- except one small piece of happiness in my children.

Mostly I'm just a girl with a broken heart.
I don't want to talk about it (except that, obviously I am right now).
I don't want you to feel sorry for me. Please leave your pity at home.
I don't want anything.

It takes a lot of energy to be strong and I don't have it today.
I'm so exhausted with my life.

It's Pablo.
Let him remind me of hearts not broken -- let him remind me of love:


I do not love you as if you were salt-rose, or topaz,
or the arrow of carnations the fire shoots off.
I love you as certain dark things are to be loved,
in secret, between the shadow and the soul.

I love you as the plant that never blooms
but carries in itself the light of hidden flowers;
thanks to your love a certain solid fragrance,
risen from the earth, lives darkly in my body.

I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where.
I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride;
so I love you because I know no other way

than this: where I does not exist, nor you,
so close that your hand on my chest is my hand,
so close that your eyes close as I fall asleep.
--sonnet 17